Monday, October 16, 2006

The secret pleasure...

Bueno, este es mi post oscuro propio. Ya lo había posteado antes, pero por falta de conocimiento nadie lo comentó. Bueno, este es una "reedición" sobre todo dedicado a Alice, Dorian, Psicho, Gaby y todos los blogguers oscuros para que opinen.
Ahí va, y en inglés.

I always hated him....

I have known him since we were children, and he always bothered me... for any reason or chance, I was slapped, kicked and fooled by this bastard neighbour of mine.
But you can think why I didn´t take revenge on him or simply didn´t claim about this to my mom or his mom.

Because he also was a great actor.

When he finished to bothering me, and a adult approached, he started to cry and turned the situation against me. A great expert in showing a pathetic-victims face, he was, yeah.... So the adults shouted or punished me while he was watching, and only between us, I noticed his devilish and sadistic smile take shape while he enjoyed his victory over me.

And every time he did that, something, or someone, was feeding on my hatred and fury.....

It continued to high school. By that time, I was even adapted to his continuous stupid jokes, and every time he picked on me, I only faced him a weak smile, and let him go.
Hmm.. Look what the continuous repression of my parents (always rooting him) could do: An apatic, slimy and miserable lame used to bear all the provocations of the people. That didn´t even bother me.

But, in the darkest depths of my mind, that little seed was growing and getting stronger. But it was protected (or sealed, maybe?) by a hard and resistant foil, made of rules, impositions and repressions.... so it could never escape.
This is going to be my most important night. My graduation party. I prepared this event for months. He doesn´t bother me anymore, because he got tired of picking on a corpse, unanimated and cold.
Good work, man. That´s the best way to do it. Just ignore him till he gets bored and goes away. Oh, this night will be a real success. My tuxedo is cleaned and ironed. A whole hour in the bathroom washing, perfuming and shaving myself! But the effort is worthy. Ok, let´s see myself in the mirror...not bad, not baaddd... Mom and Dad are hugging me now and saying that now I´m a real man. And they are not the only people I want to see me so changed and handsome.

Lynn.... my first love.

I met her a year ago, and soon we became friends. And a warm feeling started to set an unknown fire in my heart. And I´m sure she likes me, too. This is going to be THE night. It will be perfect... even my teachers honored me by letting me cut a inauguration banner in the entrance of the new computer room. Splendid! Honor, party, and love! What else can a man ask for?

The party is superb. All my mates congratulated me for cutting the banner, the music was good, and I danced 4 pieces with Lynn, and he was very away from me, maybe rooting inside from envy and greed. Now is the moment for the happy ending. This night I will become Lynn´s boyfriend. I start to search for her but suddenly I can´t see her. Where could she be? I was going to give the golden scissors as a gift , and as a prelude for the declaration....

My footsteps guided me to the backstages, and to the colosseum. My footsteps sounded very noisy on the wood floor. When, suddenly, a stony silence filled the air...

Lynn....
He.....
He was kissing her by force....

"NO!!!" Was the only thing I could yell.
Both of them turned their faces against me, her face soaked in tears, and his face... his damn face...

It´s tearing the foil...but can´t escape...
All the jokes, the bothers, HE...HE....starts to walk towards me laughing in my face, now I look at her, and she babbles something, but the sound doesn´t reach my ears...and her sweet and tender (still...) image is covered by HIM...

- Now these sweetie lips are MINE, loser....
- ........ (My hand squeezes the gift...why? I didn´t order them to do that..)
- I always was ABOVE you, little dolt, always....
- ......... (My "good boy" conduct is still repressing me, but now my hand is raised squeezing the gift, but I can´t figure why yet...)
- Hey, kiddo, what are you going to do with this, ah? Pierce me? Go! Try to do it! You can never do it! HAHAHAHA!!!
My hand makes a push, and the extreme of the scissor punctures a chest...
- Are you crazy, man???
MINE......( My blood shows off my shirt, white and red... cute comb..)
To rip the foil...
Now...It´s FREE........
- Let me introduce a little friend of mine, pal...

That dark, shadowy and unknown being I was sheltering and foiling in the deepest side of my heart, finally got out, like a butterfly from its cocoon. And the gloomy wings cover all of me. Fills my body and soul with new and lascivous desires... giving me a huge load of pleasure.
The first load....now my hand quickly swings and explores the guts of him.... He, my one and only enemy, loses all his confidence, his jokes and his humilliating words. He only is whispering very, very smoothly when the scissors and my hand travel, cut and rip through all his offenses, his slaps, his kicks, and all that melts in a bright, red fluid that covers my sleeve and drops to the wood floor. (God bless the poor people who have to clean this mess...) Lynn only gasps hiding that beautiful mouth I couldn´t kiss. No problem. There will be enough time to do this...

But there´s still desires of survival from the almost-corpse (Hah! good nick for you, man!..) "Puh-puh-pleezzz....." he can only whisper.. Awww, shut the hell up! While his imploring glare is trying to touch me, I simply draw another mouth in his neck. Simply, clean and the best finishing touch. God, these scissors are very well made. I´ll buy one of them if I need another....

Finally his body kisses the ground. His last squirts of juice reaches my face, and the drops slip down my skin (oh, I spent a whole hour washing it...what a waste....). Mmmm? Salty taste ... not bad. The pleasure, this secret and repressed pleasure jumped out the well I built for it. My dear Lynn hugs me while she is crying. No problem. It´s all over.

Sorry? Nope. I don´t feel that now. The pleasure prevents me from feeling that. Back to the good boy? Nah. This darkness combined with my soul. This heaven and hell are now inseparable.
Light...
A lot of teachers and mates are coming now, and are starting to scream and cry while they look at the body of my former enemy. Lynn is still hanging of my arm. And that´s all I need for now.

But I must make a good excuse for all this mess, though....

11 comments:

cheqa said...

prometo que quise responder pero eso de que está en inglés ahorita me da más malgenio del que ya tengo...

hoy por la noche con más calma en mis emociones me detengo y leo tu post.....

abrazos aún furiosa con la incosciencia social..desde mi cheqa...

Gabriela Bowen said...

wow...
Y todos llevamos lo oscuro por dentro... es innato..
Como la pena que carcome nuestra piel, la furia que mata nuestros niños internos, la sed de venganza que nubla nuestra vista con ese liquito viscoso que da vida pero que nuestras manos intentan arrancar de un solo tajo...
Y por más que ocultemos nuestros más oscuros deseos... siempre habrá un detonante... que lo hara estallar.. y tengan miedo mucho miedo... porque cuando se despierta a la bestia... no hay lugar seguro para esconderse...
simplemente genial tu escrito... eres de la misma casa de los escritores dark :D
Bloody kisses

Dragonfly said...

Generalmente el buen carácter y la dulzura con que uno aprende a tomar la vida, o con la que te hacen vivir las personas que quieres y te quieren, de repente sale disparado al menor contacto del gatillo y te transformas.

El relato esta muy bueno, pero me dejó como ese pequeño sabor amargo de como la envidia puede llegar a destruir tantas cosas que amamos, como puede lastimar a los que sin duda queremos, y no es que estoy diciéndo que tu seas el culpable, pero la familia y los padres cometen el error de tapar solo las faltas de alguien con el pretexto de quererlo y le hacen daño a ellos, pero le hacen más daño a los demás.

Mi historia no sé si será igual, pero es de un error y una injusticia´. Otro día, con más calma te la contaré.

Un beso y me ha gustado mucho.

I really like it. Hugs and kisses from me to you. ;)

LA Gaby said...

He deserved it!!! no more to say!

Santhros ibn Shinu said...

Evil uses to lie beneath a soft cover.

Dorian Gray said...

por qué en ingles?? el idioma español se hizo para escribir historias de terror... más adjetivos, más verbos, más conjugaciones. El miedo que se lee entre líneas es el que ma´s asusta.
La historia en general me gustó, aunque me pareció un poco hollywoodesca... soy bueno en el ingles, pero me costó leer muchas partes, finalmente lo logré jeje.

Cómo puedes saber el placer que provoca matar a alguien...lo has hecho alguna vez? lo has soñado? La tibieza que provoca la sangre sobre la piel es lo que lleva a seguir matando, los ojos, ver cómo se extingue la luz, cómo un cuerpo se retuerce, busca ayuda... te pide piedad.

Cuánto he querido saberlo, cuánto he querido sentirlo... liberar los demonios.

Escribo... pero siempre soy mis personajes, siempre hay una parte de mi en ellos...

Desde la orilla de mis cuentos

Alice in Oz said...

Bien, muy bien pero tambien creo q en español sonaria bacan, gracias x la dedicatoria amigo Tofu pasate x Oz

LaÜ said...

jajaja.. está asquerosamente descriptivo... osea muy muy bueno Tofu!!! pobre vecino !!!

Slayer said...

Come on buddy, maybe you need write more often this kind of stuff and send it to Cannibal Corpse or Obituary crew, they can put the music to this "lyrics" and will come a great success in the underground stage.

So, you can do the same for the Mortician band, did you heard the Mortician noise, many heavy metalists around the world says they are the most brutal grind-death metal band on Earth.

Go for more dude, greetings compadre.

LindaSam said...

Nice tale, it trappened me.
We want more!

Anonymous said...

It was really a tale? I hope you're not reading too many evil historys... Sincerely it is very holywoodness... nice try